How to use Self Compassion for Healing and Thriving in the New Year
Compassion opens the door to self trust and healing, placing our inner guide as the primary decision maker in our lives. Compassion is unconditional love, it’s this type of love that sits in patience and curiosity when facing a setback, grief or a trigger reminding us of past hurt. Compassion asks old personas with hurting faulty beliefs/rules, to trust that self love is the best guide. This allows us to walk toward peace while reassuring old hurts, that they can become part of the new healed future self.
We take a different path, when relying on others to tell us if we are deserving of love. This love is based on conditions which makes it difficult to hear our inner guide and understand what is in our best interest. When we struggle to find compassion, we may feel anxious or depressed, this has us walk in reacting patterns informed by fear, judgement and misalignment of our true guide. We become attached to an outcome that is designed by a persona (fawn, perfectionist, etc.), that was developed from past hurt and has us following rigid rules that no longer serve us. It’s more difficult to feel confident and hopeful when our exiles and unloved parts are directing the path from a place of fear.
It’s easier to sustain self led energy when we are connecting to the more loving and peaceful places of our life. We can tap into our intuition when we meet with a close friend or take a walk in nature, these spaces allow us to connect with our mind/body intuition. The healing work, lies in finding our self led energy when feeling triggered and overwhelmed. Having our own self guide lead in peaceful and turbulent times develops a belief in self compassion which brings self trust and true healing.
Tuning inward when you feel overwhelmed, fearful or judging of self/others is an act of compassion. When your whole family looks to you to solve a problem or blames you for a problem, this is the moment to find your own quiet and tune into your inner guide. This moment needs quiet and kindness to your self. You can ask yourself, what does your hurt and pain need in this moment, is it different from your families opinion of the situation. There is hidden benefit of letting others tell us what the problem and solution is, we receive conditional care and love which can feel better than judgement or anger.
Self Compassion steps into the unknown and deepens self trusts by listening to your inner guide with love. For example, a family member is unkind to you, you decide to set a boundary and stop problem solving with this person. This can cause a family members unhealed parts to react, judge and take away their love. Viewing your feelings with importance and love while peacefully allowing others to organize their own feelings, is the first step toward self trust. Awareness of your own feelings and a boundary to protect it, is compassion. This allows you to communicate to the universe, that you deserve compassionate love that finds you and nurtures happiness and joy.
Continuing to tune into your own inner guide with love and curiosity creates answers and responses that bring in miracles and love to your world. “Allow the universe to surprise you with something greater than you can imagine- beyond your wildest dreams.” Gabby Bernstein Ending certain habits and in some cases relationships that interfere with a deeper care, love and understanding of yourself is a powerful step in starting over in the new year.